doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
he pissed his pants, and she still wants to hook me up with him. I try not to date guys with bladder control problems... Unless they're loaded anyway.
so my daughter wakes me up this morning and i feel like a vibration so im thinking she has my phone..nope my vibrator
He was rambling about life and dignity and happiness. but all i kept thinking was PENIS. YOU HAVE A PENIS. I CAN SHOW YOU WHERE TO PUT THAT PENIS.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I spent ten minutes questioning her on what kind of cup she wanted... Then I asked what kind of water she wanted..
WOAH TOO HIGH
Here's what I don't understand. How does anyone watch you eat mayo for 12 minutes and then ever fuck you again??
Don't send me heart emojis when you're jacking off.
There's some random guy here dryhumping my kitchen door. If he is a friend of yours, please come and retrieve him.
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
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