I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
If you want to borrow my flask for all future interviews as a good luck charm because your last one went so well with it in your suit pocket, just let me know
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
Just saw a midget on an elliptical. Epic.
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
Randomize
