So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
When the shrooms kicked in we both simultaneously realized we were not the right puzzle piece for the dubstep puzzle.
We made eye contact and were like we are not welcome here, the ravers are onto us and we need to get the fuck out before we get shuffled upon
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
Just took a piss in some random bushes in a traffic jam and had to sprint back to the car. I'm a boss.
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
Some girl dressed in nothing but Wonder Woman underwear and a cape on her ass just started twerking all over us. Remind me why I'd never been to a midnight of Rocky horror before?
I just opened a pickle jar stoned as fuck. I clapped for myself. I feel like wonder woman.
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
Randomize
