no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
People were autographing me. I'm like the spring break yearbook
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
Which sister was it? The one I accidentally hit when my shoe flew off or the one I ate candy off of when we were high?
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
I texted him "my vagina is pounding for you"
I know, you made me proof read it.
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
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