your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
today's thought: if you're naming your fb album "wEdDiNg dAy!!!!!!" you're too young to get married
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
Just scrubbed my teeth for a good twenty minutes. Herpes is afraid of toothpaste, right?
I just walked past a woman in the bar stroking a mans crotch, yelling 'I made this. I made this happen.'
I just stabbed open a can of Spaghetti Os with a spork. Who says I cant take care of myself?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
It's a sad night when one of your friend texts you that she's going on a date with someone you know and then invites you to maybe have a drink after
I feel like a dancer trapped in the body of a math instructor. Love, Mom
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