Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
she was sobbing drunk in the backseat about her dead cat and how the guy in the front seat didn't want to hook up with her
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
Bring scissors.....i think im gonna have to be cut out of this damn jockstrap
I picked up the bartender so he could open the bar early and ended up with him giving me a ride home when he closed. I like snowdays and everything, but they get really expensive. Also, I think I threw up on his front door. Not checking.
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
You were laying in a hotel bed drinking beer from a straw while you demanded everyone to kiss your foot tattoo.
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
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