HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
Her directions to the house party: "the north star will guide you, turn left. I'm wearing the potato hat"
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
you texted me "dude im face"
it sounded so right at the time
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
I was driving around a golf cart with a keg in the back before I got caught by the cops. First slow speed chase ever
I am eating a king sized snickers in the strip club. Good morning.
I think I'm gunna glue a sign to my head that says "WAKE ME UP BEFORE 7!" And go to sleep and hope a kind passer by wakes me up for my exam .
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
Randomize
