We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
I'm twenty-five. I'm too old to be watching my friend throw up in Chipolte Parking lot.
What the hell do I have to do to get some foreplay around here? This sucks.
I think you know the answer.
How can I marinade myself in Vodka?
just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
Just spilled a coffee mug full of scolding hot oatmeal on my bare dick. Hope you're having a good Friday night too.
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
Look, if it comes down to it, I’m spraying whipped cream on your nuts
Randomize
