this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
It was the best present I've gotten since I was 5 and I got a fucking easy bake oven. I'm not pregnant for realsies. Celebratory party at the house tonight. Invite all the nice dicks you know.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
Some girl woke me up at 1:30 am looking for weed and the next thing I know I'm in a hot tub with 3 girls, 2 40's, and a blunt.
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This week I fucked a police officer and called both the Senators from the state I'm in and the one I'm moving to. What have you done since the election?
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
If I ever drink whiskey again make sure I don't eat the plastic cups that I'm drinking them from.
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
He jerked off some dude with a slice of Wonder Bread.
The sports guy?
Yeah. They claimed the bread made it hetero
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