i am only reminding you that showing off your fellatio skills on vegetables is probably not an appropriate party trick
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
A guy at the bar bought me a jag bomb because I'm the chick that frosts his donuts at KT. Never have I been more proud of being a failure at life.
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
Oh my god, I am the best RA ever. I'm teaching my freshman girls how to deep throat on bananas as a group bonding activity. I'm making the religious ones eat them for potassium.
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
I just sang Hey Jude with a homeless man and then we drank beer together. Then I watched asians take pictures under a xmas tree for an hour and fell asleep in an MGM Grand bathroom stall. #AloneinVegas
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
Today, my weed came in a pokéball. I officially love my dealer.
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
Randomize
