Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
I had to have my mom pick me up from the party and the windows lock was on so when I went to projectile vomit out the window it wouldn't roll down and it splashed back at my face.
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
bring the dog... nobody goes to jail with a dog.
There's a 35% chance I'm still residually drunk from last night.
And you say you're not good with numbers...
Imagine getting smashed in the dick by a basketball. A basketball made of metal. With spikes. That's pretty much what his dick looked like.
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
Now I am free. And I want to go meet men. My phone deleted all my contacts, and I consider this to be a new beginning. With a new man in my phone book.
Randomize
