i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
I tried to order champagne at IHOP last night
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
I mean we all knew i was gonna get arrested eventually but shoplifting is lame so dont tell anyone. Well just let them assume public nudity or something
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