did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
LMAO!!! just remembered you said this to me last night. "sometimes you post too many Jesus tweets. It's not that that's really bad... But I roll my eyes and you should know that."
I was drunk but it's true
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
He tried peeing out of the sunroof.
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
i woke up the next morning in a pool of blood in my bathroom and a pinata donkeys head in my bed
so much for an anticlimactic 22nd birthday
This isn't fair. Why can't sober me be good at bejeweled?
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
The stripper was dressed as the green lantern. Even for a geeky girls' bachelorette party it was lame ass.
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
Randomize
