so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
Women are like Alzheimers patiens. You can compliment them a million times in a day, but the next day is always a wash, you have to start all over.
Now that my 6 day bender is behind me, I just realized I might have been the one who took a shit in our mailbox that past few days.
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
Who was the girl that woke me up at 4am to tell me "there's an emergency, we need you to come smoke weed"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
Wellp yesterday was spent absurdly hungover and today was spent in planned parenthood so I hope that's not an indication of the year to come
I will have you know I turned Latino David Arquette down for sex because he's married. Total. Moral. Victory.
Flo's in town, ain't she.
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
Family acid trip. They're welcoming me into the family.
What. The. Fuck.
Family acid trip.
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
Randomize