The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
You were absolutely insistent that the entire bar knew that it was peanut butter jelly time
When she gives birth, I'm so playing 'Eye of the Tiger'
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
He asked us to wake him up with a strobe light. We had it going in front of his face full power for half and hour and he didn't even blink.
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
It's amazing how hard it it while drunk to not comment "fuck you" on dumb peoples' statuses
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
Randomize
