I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
also I just used a straw to drink the juice out of a tomato b/c I forgot how to bite.
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
I want to apologize but I don't know how. Do I just say "sorry for OD'ing on your couch"? I think that just sounds weird.
everyone thought he was too sick to make it, but he showed up. Ten minutes in and he's doing vodka shots with nyquil chasers
trading diseases for a hangover? that's either a really good decision or a really, really bad one. we'll find out if he wakes up tomorrow
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
Plan B, arranged marriage to a rich Indian, is rapidly becoming Plan A. Fuck Finals.
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
Randomize