at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
i feel like i'm a professional at blowjobs i can deep throat an entire spatula
I remember why I come home for the holidays. Sam Adams is the cheapest beer in the fridge
A guy in a sombrero stopped to take a picture with me sitting on the curb.
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
I woke up at like 4 am with an old Korean woman cuddling me. I assure you she was not there when I went to sleep.
Bring me that man meat
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
You would be successful and sober without me. you can't turn your bakon me now
Now that I'm sober I feel the need to tell you that I'm not really a fish whisperer....
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
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