This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
Haha, just learned changing others iPhone passcodes is fun while drunk but not fun the next morning.
i woke up today to a handjob from this really fat girl that keeps calling me michael phelps
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
Please tell me you have Advil or Tylenol or ibuprofen or a fucking baseball bat
Now we're discussing the sex we had and the later lack thereof. It's like marriage counseling via snapchat.
I have no reason to put on pants anymore. This is my new reality.
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
Got baked and laid and ate baked lays when I laid down while baking the brownies I I’m Superman
You’re still high, aren’t you?
Oh yeah
Randomize
