This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
I'm sure that's not what the inventers of the Turkey baster had in mind, but that's what I had in mine.
I'm at this kids house trying to figure out if I pissed in his kitchen new years eve. Lmao, stop letting me drink.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know when you blow me it's the softest, most amazing feeling ever. Like putting my dick in a silk bag filled with puppy ears.
She told me to act like the hulk during sex. Shit got 9 different shades of weird
Everybodys gonna want to make out w me dressed as big bird
Big bird is like some childhood daddy fantasy come true for carnival
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I gave a very stressed out cashier a mini bottle from my purse the day after Christmas. It's what Jesus would have done.
You're a good person. Sharing is caring.
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
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