Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
I'm too hungover to be in a fucking cow suit right now
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
When you awake you'll realize that your car is missing....just know that I had it and becuz of your car I hooked up with the hot bar tender that looks like that guy from bay-watch however I parked it in a loading zone and it was towed...that sex was TOTALLY worth it love you
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
It's a good thing my liver is flexible because a lesser man would be dead
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
Hey, I was just wondering why i dont have a shirt on, why im cuddling with a furnace, why im in my own basement, and where my car is.
A reminder in my phone just went off saying, "Fuck.On.Roof- the Great Bambino". This makes me excited and slightly nervous.
Randomize
