i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
I enjoy that i have a whole shelf of clothes that I've accumulated from random sex. You know the ones you get to make the morning after look less awkward like similar to an athletes trophy shelf
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
turns out Discover card thinks that if you spend $450 at four different liquor stores in one evening that the card "must have been stolen"
The neighbors are smoking hash and doing Julia Child impressions...again.
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
I fell asleep after the worst sex of my life and now I'm snowed in with him. SEND HELP. CALL FEMA. GET ME OUT OF HERE.
I can't believe we really went to walgreens to use their cork opener, bounced and drank a bottle of wine in a sketchy corner...
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
Randomize
