HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
Gonna post on craigs list missed connections - "I was that really drunk bitch that threw up in your car. I'd like to pay for detailing"
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
He's the kind of drunk guy that would pee in your mouth while you give him head.
He said the first movie he ever jerked off to was Titanic because he knew "they were totally doing it in that car."
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
I was 40 minutes late to work today because I was getting fucked. Walked in to discover that it's apparently performance review day. Employee of the year.
Randomize
