Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
are you serious? he told me he had to cancel bc his grandma came into town
well unless his grandma is 21 and blonde, HE LIED TO YOU IDIOT
she was so wasted that she tried to tuck me in and read the jokes on the taco bell sauce as a bed time story
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
They wont sell alcohol here on election day! HOW THE FUCK DO THEY EXPECT ME TO ENJOY THE ELECTION SOBER?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just watched my entire extended family eat salad out of the bowl i threw up in last night.
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
You FaceTimed me to show me he was sucking your tit
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
Access to a Target is paramount to my general happiness and self-worth.
Randomize