i'm pretty sure the devil's penis is california-shaped
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
Best thing law school has taught me: how to use logic to turn a girls "no I will not have sex with you" into "well I might as well get laid"
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
we gave you a glass of water and you just started yelling: TWO STRAWS, PATS AN ENGINEER HE'LL FIGURE IT OUT
Well yeah connect the two together, then you can lay down and drink.
Just realized I chose a bacon cheeseburger over sex last night
HE PEED ON ME. THE MANAGER OF THE BAR.
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
I'm starting to notice a direct correlation between blackouts and broken bones...
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
Randomize
