I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
They woke me up at 4 in the morning screaming "drunk adventure time!" because they needed a sober chaperone. They made me walk them around the block shoeless.
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Now that we have successfully procreated, I need to know we are on the same page. Please tell me you are aware that there are whole seasons of our lives that our child can NEVER be made privy to.
We should probably write this down. That's a shit load of shit.
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
But we only had three ninja turtles. So everyone that would ask us where Donatello was, we would say "what? He's gone? Shredder is at it again!"
Why is no one on Snapchat tonight? I want to see other people having fun so I know it still exists.
Attention, i sprayed windex on me to disguise the scent of sex and regret off my clothes from last night
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