you may be an alcoholic when your drug dealer calls to yell at you for drinking too
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
I just watched the lion king for the first time in years. It's like the equivalent of a really good blow job.
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
I just bottomed with the last unicorn playing in the background. I've hit a new level of gay.
You're breaking my sexual little heart
Jeff brought me a cup of coffee to my desk. He's getting a blow job.
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
Randomize
