respond to me or i'm telling everyone that you inserted a vodka soaked tampon into your anus
Have you ever seen a 300 pound pregnant lady's boob fall out of her shirt cuz she's not wearing a bra? I have.
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
I woke up with spaghetti in my mouth
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
Ima go for a jog. and I'm going to jog until I throw up a lung. then I'll crawl home.
After you verbally abused the McDonalds employee for not making your fries fast enough, the fact that you woke up on a random lawn does not surprise me.
Sat in the shower and reenacted the "Wiggle your big toe" scene from Kill Bill. THAT hungover.
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
also Jesus you really need to change your diet. I just washed your baby gravy out of my hair and it's so acidic my hair is damaged. You have killer sperm
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
you grabbed the breathalyzer at dinner, blew a 0.20 and told the waitress you'd eat her ass
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
Randomize