I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
Bring your kids so they can distract our kids so we can drink beer in peace.
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
Woke up in my underwear and Christmas sweater. Only. Eggnog has won the battle but not the war.
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
He did a line of coke off my stomach then flipped me over and smacked my ass. Then, while he was talking dirty to me, he told me he wanted to hire someone to clean my room. And that's when he lost his boner. Life is so hard.
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
AND ONCE AGAIN, MY VAGINA HAS STRUCK AGAIN. HER PLANS TO TAKE OVER MARYLAND ARE WELL ON THEIR WAY AS SHE CONTINUES TO ENGULF EVERY QUEER IN A 10 MILE RADIUS
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
Remember that one time you told the bartender he was fuckable? Well, he's here.
Sent. All. My. Texts. Like. This. Last. Night. Thank. You. Weed. Also. Had. A. Dream. About. A. Serial. Killer. That. Killed. Everyone. Except. Me. And.
I don’t care that he’s a decade younger. He’s cute and I need a good penising
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