If my vag had twitter, what do you think it would say?
I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
She was into my hawaiian shirt and id never made out with a dinosaur... I feel like it worked out for everyone
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
He got a new tattoo in prison. It's actually a good tattoo, making it that much harder for me to hold out until he's off house arrest.
honestly dont worry about it, its not the first time ive injured myself on a potted cactus during sexual relations with a woman
She said she was hoping I'd be hotter. I told her I didn't see anybody standing in line to titty fuck her either. She was a great kisser.
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
It's sunday night and I just went to the store to buy cookie dough and condoms, I'm so proud of myself.
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