I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
you started crying about dinosaurs being extinct
that's why i woke up holding that dina girls hand
she's a dina-saur
You tried to tell me you weren't high while you were eating French onion dip out of the jar with a spoon
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
I just realized I consumed seven different types of alcohol this weekend. And I'm only counting jungle juice as one of those. How the fuck did I not die?
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
I skipped the handshake and went right for a dickshake I had him minutes after I saw him.
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