But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
All I know is when I checked my phone this morning google translate was open with "help the cow ate my robot" translated to French
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
so hungover i had to get off the train to puke, rallied and went to work. not sure if that's an adulting win or fail
I can't believe he's mad at you for not remembering your fake anniversary.
Nothing says "Jesus has forgiven your sins" like finding out you're not pregnant on Easter.
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
holy f. i broke my toe giving him head. how does that even happen!?
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
Randomize
