Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
yesterday i saw a blind man guiding himself into a NYC tour bus... and i thought i waste money
Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
i just watched a video of two girls fucking with a banana and i thought of you.
i hate you
apparently people get pissed when you take the bag of wine out of the franzia box and put it in your purse before leaving the party
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
composition of my stomach right now: 60% C8H10N4O2 * H2O (coffee), 20% CaCO3 (pepto bismol/tums), 10% HCl (stomach acid), 5% fried rice, 5% residual adderall. i can do that by percent mass too. fuck you finals.
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
Sorry I didn't call this morning. Ended up with a decorated war veteran last night who besides finding the enemy, KNEW where the fuck my G spot was. He gets a medal in my book!
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
He said I have the “Denzel Washington” of vaginas.
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
Randomize
