quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
Fuck 8am classes
Dear Jesus I'm gonna throw up through my eyes
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
I think I might have accidentally had a threesome last night with two good friends. See, this is what happens when you leave me.
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
my mom tried to talk to me about my drinking, i somehow turned it around on her, now shes going to AA and I'm going to the bar.
Plus i lost a button on my shirt and we got free drinks all night. Sorry I'm not sorry.
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
Randomize
