Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
My lash glue is stronger than my sense of self respect
Randomize
