I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
i woke up surrounded by junior mints. not to mention, there was a huge pyramid of natty cans baracading the door shut. this is why i can't drink alone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
just tried to pee in the sink at wendys...need to stop letting my drunk habits get into my sober life
"can of pringles" is totally a legitimate measure of time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
I'm running on two hours of sleep, a shot of vodka, and half of a granola bar. I can't be held responsible for what I do.
I swear, the guy behind me wasn't paying attention until the words "middle aged fuckboy" came out of my mouth.
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
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