that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
ok, im coming! i just found some lemon square in my bangs, washing that out..this shit is all over me! was i in a pie eating contest?
yes
did i win? did you like my outfit? or should i change, if you were horny would you bang me?
a girl walking in front of me just packed her cigarettes 72 times and yes i counted
how much adderall did you take today?
look out your window.... he's holding his iphone up like a boombox playing you beach boys
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
All of my exes are either overweight and neckbearded or dead. Someone out there is looking out for me.
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
Dude, the T Swift concert might not be so bad after all. Can you say milfs living vicariously through their teenage daughters? Score.
If you’re wondering why the bong is outside the garage door just know I was being environmentally efficient by not using the freezer to chill my shit
my mom walked in on me eating her out, and i can never kiss my mother again.
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
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