I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
Totally just grabbed the wrong dick. Damn this tequila.
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its preseason football. its like non alcoholic beer. who gives a fuck
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
Jerry got outside again, i found him making dirt angels in the garden. I need to put a bell on that bastard.
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
I'm about to order this penis-casting kit so text me within 5 mins if you're not down
Your phone just changed "liver" to "liquor" how dose that make you feel
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
Guess it's not a good idea to try lighting a cigarette with my stove drunk, I burnt off half my bangs.
What is the best medium with which to say, "Happy Birthday, I'm having your abortion"... Cake? Card?
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