Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
The first sip always goes straight to my vagina.
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
She asked me why I was wearing a Batman Suit. Have I ever needed a reason to wear a Batman Suit?
You leave a trail of fuck everywhere you go
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
I puked in the back of my mom's new car because I had too much to drink at Chilis. I think I just hit rock bottom.
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
Randomize
