Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
so, is "hi, did i take your virginity six years ago and never call afterwards?" an appropriate greeting in a bar?
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
Vague recollection of me ripping your shirt off at the bar... I hope I asked first, otherwise that's real rude.
At the gym and this really hot trainer checked me out and was talking to his buddy about his workout. He then says "yeah man, like I'm doing so many reps- what's 7 times 7, 45?"
He was THIS close.
That awesome feeling when you are pooping on the same toilet that nobel laureates have pooped on
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era