So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
When you went off to sleep with that guy that looked like a dirty Jesus and I asked why all you had to say "trying to keep Christ in Christmas" and left. The Vatican called, you're going to Hell.
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
Not only did she fulfill a life long dream of mine of banging in a library, she bought me subway for lunch. I feel like I got the best gold star ever today.
Somehow you're a lightweight AND an alcoholic. Rare combo in one person. Well done.
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
My neighbour just came round to ask why we posted a spatula through his door at 3am. What do I tell him??
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
Randomize
