apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
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This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
Caught in the act of lying. Lipstick literally all over his dick. He tried to make some story about darkwing duck or some shit but failed to realize he is a complete moron.
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
Thanks for letting me in last night. I was drunkenly sleepwalking.
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Drunk girl in a bikini just tried to bite my face, it's officially spring break
He stared me down while singing "Let Me Love You" to me while we were having sex. I don't know whether to marry him or file a restraining order.
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
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