If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
I've discovered the best way to avoid rehab is to not fuck fat chicks when your drunk, therefore delaying regrets and rock bottom
your the Dr. Phil in my life
Today is an unchanging day
Dude. My knees have no hair on them and they're bruised. My thigh is killing me. I have about 1000 texts to about 5 exes which I horribly regret. I have pictures of my own penis on my phone. I can't find my iPad. And I have work in an hour.
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
I've never had someone so bad at kissing. It was like he was trying to block my airway with his tongue and he succeeded...
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
There's a cute bearded guy at this brew fest wearing a kilt and selling mead
TELL HIM ABOUT MY DOWRY!!!
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
Randomize
