haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
so you masturbated because Oprah told you?
She tried to ditch the cab before she payed but she forgot to grab her shoes and wake me up
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
Go to a building you've never been before and take a shit. It's marvelous
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
So apparently my bro is going to make me fix his tattoo this trip... He sent me a pic of said tattoo. Tattoo is of a sperm, on his penis, which was in a woman's mouth... Wth
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