Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
Great. There's a birthday party at work today. Now I can stand around and feel uncomfortable for an hour.
I was in the bathroom and heard my brother scream "YOU FAIL!!!", and I swear to GOD, I thought my penis was yelling at me.
We talk about tequila and blow jobs the way that normal people talk about the news and the weather.
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
Escorted out of jimmy johns because I refused to leave with my dog. Stole a loaf of bread on the way out.
This is one of those times I wish I had a time machine so I could go back and punch myself in the face to make me realize what I need to do before it's too late
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
I slept naked with a towel wrapped around my waist in case I pissed the bed again
Got drunk in Atlantic City Flagged down some guy with two wrapped tampons like road flares for a cigarette.
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
Randomize
