I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
I think I tried picking up these girls last night by asking them what their favorite color was...I obviously woke up alone
I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
Get dressed up for her? please, I could shit my pants and she would still blow me
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
She definitely pulled a diaper out of her purse and cleaned up the vodka with it, where do you meet these people?!
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
Slutty costumes are my most sacred holiday tradition! Wearing a not-slutty costume is like putting cheezwiz on a communion wafer.
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
Hopefully they won't bring up last year's Christmas party. I kind of predicted my great aunt's death...
I'm on a walk of shame carrying YOUR pants. You owe me.
This is going to be so stupid, but do you feel the calluses on my hands when I give you a handy?
Randomize
