Well the candle wax mightve been sexy if he didn't drop the candle and light half my bed on fire
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
he had the kids march single file in front of us on the way home so they didn't have to watch him pulling me passed out in their wagon...
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
His status said "sad." of course I liked it. I don't even care that I was the only one. Facebook isn't your god damn journal, we don't care about your problems.
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
Have 7 min to kill while I wait for liquor store to open. Feels really awkward.
Should probably stop going into the gas station to look for the most normal person to hitch a ride with to drive me to a party
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
You know you have a problem when your man yells at you that his penis is not your personal play toy.
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
All I’ve had today is sex and water. I think it’s time for tacos.
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize