I've been at work for less than an hour and have pooped twice already. That's what happens when you start sleeping with your roommate and don't want to use the bathroom at home anymore.
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
i had a dream last night that my liver tore its self out of my body and ran away.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Woke up with a full plate of KFC next to my face. I didn't really question it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The guy I brought home last night made a speedy escape while I was in the bathroom. The only trace I found of his flight was a lone sock on the stairs.... It was like a whorey low budget Cinderella
I immediately retract my statement involving hylecopters being allowed to blow up sharks out of the water.... The idea if it is super incredible but ultimately it would be cruel and unessesary
I tried to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, and New Years all in one night.
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
Excuse me I just made a hot pocket without burning down the house, I think i can do anything.
We're hate flirting, damnit.