My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
The party invite said "this ain't no lame stoplight party, you come to hookup or you don't come" I feel like their honesty deserves out attendance
Not to mention having our pick at the ensuing sausagefest
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
I may or may not have puked in the ladies room. Now I get to convince my client to go to substance abuse treatment. Oh, the irony.
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
Randomize
