You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
i was getting a blow-job tonight in the mens bathroom of a bar and the bouncer comes in and says "bro i don't mean to cock block but you cant do that here."
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
I have my ice chest next to my bed. Instead of breakfast in bed, its beers in bed. 10x better
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
Something about being drunk at 1pm chasing seagulls on the beach while it's raining is very calming
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
I told him if he ever gets a "wink" text from me after 10:00pm to assume I really mean "we should be hooking up by 2:30am"
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.
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