i don't like sucking hair
At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
He's the equivalent of a body pillow and a dildo. But still funny. We have good pillow talk.
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
I had to rub one out before the Shabbat dinner in case I find a nice Jewish girl to fuck me in the bathroom.
Your mother would be so proud
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
I gave him a handjob in the uber car. Life is really spiraling downwards.
You start to question your party girl tendencies when you're wearing the same shirt you wore the night before to work and you're trying to get last nights Jell-O shot off the sleeve on your way to work
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
Listen all we did was not even pretend we aren’t each other’s type and live together and constantly encourage each other to get laid for 6 months.
Idk how it devolved into us fucking.
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
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