Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
you screamed santa and jumped in front of 50 kids to tell him you wanted a bong for christmas.
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
your house isnt even gonna be on google maps after this party
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
Some guy at the bar last night bought us Arrowhead water and I was so drunk, it tasted good
Randomize
